Monday (for Dave)

Its monday morning and I feel electrisity in the air.
No not the static kind that messes up girls hair.
Nor the scary lightning-storm kind.

Just an energy and an excitement I havent felt in awhile.
I feel full and complete and more like the self of me that I actually like.

Not that life is peachy. I mean, my direct deposit didnt go through on friday so when I thought I had money I really didnt, my bunion on my foot is swollen so it kinda hurts to walk around and Im sorta hobbleing through my day, and I had spent most of the last four days being sick. But I rose early this morning, and spent some time reading the Bible, praying, and getting ready for my day. I went down to starbucks and got some tea (not because I really wanted starbucks but because my beautiful woman works down there. It was worth driving the 35 minute round trip just to see her smile) I guess I just felt ready to meet my day. Ready to see what God was going to do.

Its funny how we can slip out of things so easily. I mean it wasnt like this conscience decision to abandon God. I mean i was still reading (ocassionally) and heading out to the church to be involved with The Well and church and stuff, but I was lagging behind in the way I was taking care of relationships in my life, and generally being sort of self-involved. And you know what? Its a patern I see in my life. If I start to slide a bit, my "ministry" doesnt seem to suffer as much as my friendships and mentorship type relationships do.

I mean i guess Im sorta stupid. Filling my self up with all sorts of stuff that leaves me, craving more, appitite unfuffilled, when really I know exactly what I need to fill me up. Its like being thirsty and eating saltine crackers, i just get more and more thirsty. What i really need is a cool refreshing drink of water.

So Im reading through the book of Revelation, and this was the verse that stuck out to me this morning as Im trying to re-engage in this discipline of rising early and seeking God in the mornings. Its Jesus, speaking to one of the churches in Asia Minor in chapter 2 (and speaking to me as well.)

"I know all the things you do. I have seen your hard work and your patient endurance. I know you don't tolerate evil people. You have examined the claims of those who say they are apostles but are not. You have discovered they are liars. You have patiently suffered for me without quitting. But I have this complaint against you. You don't love me or each other as you did at first! Look how far you have fallen from your first love! Turn back to me again and do as you did at first."