Soul

Be sure that the ins and outs of your individuality are no mystery to Him; and one day they will no longer be a mystery to you.-Jack Lewis
Doenst it seem strange that the majority of my time is spent struggling aganst my self... that it is my inmost desires that cause the wellspring of selfishness and pride that leave me exausted; having given me my fill of sin while still leaving me so empty inside.
Sin is living insuch a way that we were not designed for. 
In the same way that our bodies need oxygen and food and water and cant live on certain things, our souls were designed to need Him. And how much more important are our souls. Because we are not bodies with souls, we are souls with bodies. And those things which we cling to so tightly, will eventually crumble till we are grasping for dust in the lonley places. 
And so I fell lost into that lonleyness...
But there the silence and the solitude began to overtake me. It rushed at me, deafening me with the roar of silence. Everything that I had been able to rationalize, every feeling, every thought, every action came back to me and the realization came to me that I was more broken than I thought. I had spent so much time away that I wasn't sure I was even His anymore. And I couldn't tell anybody. How could I? Here was a pastor who had reached the pinicle and found that he had been climbing the wrong peak. That what looks like success in ministry may not lead to that place where I find rest for my weary soul.
And in the lonleyness of my everyday existance, i began to hear a voice that had been calling the same thing since the creation of the world. "Adam where are you?" It had been so long since I had heard that voice that I almost didnt recognize him as friend.  And feably I called out with a voice parched from the desert, "Here I am."  
And thats when He takes me into His solitude, to that quieter, simpler life, where I can stop fussing and freting, to a place thats out of the wind.
What is the point of all this?
Though I hate to be lonley, it is often the prescription that my diseased soul need. It allows for that 'moment of reflection' where all that seemed so nessisary passes by the wayside and all that I had pushed to the wayside becomes absolutly nessisary.
Lonlyness and solitude and silence are not bad things.
They lead us to prayer.
They lead us to Him
And He has offered us rest for our weary souls.
-Adam Thomas