December 29, 2005
Far
I remembered you with my soul clenched in that sadness of mine that you know. Where were you then? Who else was there? Saying what? Why will the whole of love come on me suddenly when I am sad and feel you are far away?
December 28, 2005
3. Words
Its funny how words get in the way of what we want to say.
The spoken word only communicates so much.
Its easy to speak of tangible things. The chair is green. The book is heavy. Drive to the store. Subjects, nouns, verbs, adjectives. They seem to fall short though when talking about certain things. Fear, love, hope, stuggles, desires, feelings...
I fear that my words do more harm and less good than I would want for my life.
"When the fish is caught, the net is forgoten. When the animal is caught the snare is forgoten. When the idea is caught, the words are forgoten. Show me the man who has forgoten the words. He is the one with whom I wish to speak."
A. T. Elwer
The spoken word only communicates so much.
Its easy to speak of tangible things. The chair is green. The book is heavy. Drive to the store. Subjects, nouns, verbs, adjectives. They seem to fall short though when talking about certain things. Fear, love, hope, stuggles, desires, feelings...
I fear that my words do more harm and less good than I would want for my life.
"When the fish is caught, the net is forgoten. When the animal is caught the snare is forgoten. When the idea is caught, the words are forgoten. Show me the man who has forgoten the words. He is the one with whom I wish to speak."
A. T. Elwer
Stuck
...in my head... "Grace, she carries a world on her hips No champagne flue for her lips No twirls or skips between her fingertips She carries a pearl in perfect condition What once was hurt What once was friction What left a mark no longer stings Because Grace makes beauty out of ugly things"
Words
If I had a command of the english language then... A dictionary would be filled with soldiers for my army... My pen would be my personal weapon... I would only be limited by my ideas, and not my vocabulary...
December 26, 2005
Firby = Super Hampster
I swear it said "No Bueno" when I turn him upside down... Its kinda like a Super Hampster...
December 21, 2005
December 14, 2005
Pablo
"And it was at that age...Poetry arrived
in search of me. I don't know, I don't know where
it came from, from winter or a river.
I don't know how or when,
no, they were not voices, they were not
words, nor silence,
but from a street I was summoned,
from the branches of night,
abruptly from the others,
among violent fires
or returning alone,
there I was without a face
and it touched me.
I did not know what to say, my mouth
had no way
with names
my eyes were blind,
and something started in my soul,
fever or forgotten wings,
and I made my own way,
deciphering
that fire
and I wrote the first faint line,
faint, without substance, pure
nonsense,
pure wisdom
of someone who knows nothing,
and suddenly I saw
the heavens
unfastened
and open,
planets,
palpitating planations,
shadow perforated,
riddled
with arrows, fire and flowers,
the winding night, the universe.
And I, infinitesmal being,
drunk with the great starry
void,
likeness, image of
mystery,
I felt myself a pure part
of the abyss,
I wheeled with the stars,
my heart broke free on the open sky." P. N.
in search of me. I don't know, I don't know where
it came from, from winter or a river.
I don't know how or when,
no, they were not voices, they were not
words, nor silence,
but from a street I was summoned,
from the branches of night,
abruptly from the others,
among violent fires
or returning alone,
there I was without a face
and it touched me.
I did not know what to say, my mouth
had no way
with names
my eyes were blind,
and something started in my soul,
fever or forgotten wings,
and I made my own way,
deciphering
that fire
and I wrote the first faint line,
faint, without substance, pure
nonsense,
pure wisdom
of someone who knows nothing,
and suddenly I saw
the heavens
unfastened
and open,
planets,
palpitating planations,
shadow perforated,
riddled
with arrows, fire and flowers,
the winding night, the universe.
And I, infinitesmal being,
drunk with the great starry
void,
likeness, image of
mystery,
I felt myself a pure part
of the abyss,
I wheeled with the stars,
my heart broke free on the open sky." P. N.
December 12, 2005
Bruised by Cowardice
And as a man who unwills what he wills, changing his plan for every little thought till he withdraws from any kind of start So did I turn my mind on that dark verge, for thingking ate away th enterprise so prompt in the beginning set forth "If I have understood your words aright" repied the shade of that greathearted man, "your sprit has been bruised by cowardice, Which many a time so weighs a man's heart down it turns him from a glorius enterprise as shadows fool the horse that shies away...
December 9, 2005
The Writing on the Wall
Mene, Mene, Tekel, Uparsin.
"Numbered, Weighed, and Divided."
A hand appears in the court and begins writing on the the wall. Slowly in fear and wonder they read, M......E.......N.......E, mene? What does this mean they ask themselves. Mene like the small coin? The hand continues on, mene, mene tekel uparsin. Is this a debt owed, the price of something? The King at this point is more than troubled.
And then a boy steps foward
Mene, mene, sire. Your Days have been numbered.
Tekel, sire. You have been measured and found Wanting
Uparson. Divided, sire, your kingdom will be divided from you.
And all this came to pass that very night.
Have you seen the writing on the wall?
Nada será como antes... It will never be like it was before.
Sometimes I feel like the king. Exposed by the hand of another. Measured by so many and found wanting. People wanting to tear the kingdom around me down.
But when I think of Jesus saying these same words... I feel joy.
"Adam" He says. "I have numbered all the days of your life, your joy and your struggles, even the number of the hairs on your head. I know when you rise, and when you sleep, when you go in and come home. I know you in the valleys and the mountain tops. There is no where you can go to excape from my spirit. I have numbered you among those that love and follow me."
"And Adam" He says "I have measured you and found you faithful. I have seen the depth and the breath of who you are, and I love you still. Remeber that I have measured and layed out you course, I and no other. And that those who measured you and found you wanting were using a measure which is not mine."
"And yes Adam" He says "I am going to divide you from your kingdom. All that you've built, all that you've made, all that you've put your hand to by the sweat of your brow, I am going to divide you from it. In fact I've already started. Have you noticed how nothing quite seems to satisfy you? Some things come close, but eventually those seem to loose their luster. My child, if there is a desire that nothing in this world can satisfy, perhaps it is because you were not meant for this world. Child let go of your kingdom, release you grip on every thing that you hold dear and sacred and come be a servant in my kingdom. Come be a child of the king. And all of this will change, you will change. And all those people you knew before and all those things you did before will be there when you get back, only... it will be you that has changed"
"Nothing will be like it was before."
"The old is gone and the new is comming"
-Adam
"Numbered, Weighed, and Divided."
A hand appears in the court and begins writing on the the wall. Slowly in fear and wonder they read, M......E.......N.......E, mene? What does this mean they ask themselves. Mene like the small coin? The hand continues on, mene, mene tekel uparsin. Is this a debt owed, the price of something? The King at this point is more than troubled.
And then a boy steps foward
Mene, mene, sire. Your Days have been numbered.
Tekel, sire. You have been measured and found Wanting
Uparson. Divided, sire, your kingdom will be divided from you.
And all this came to pass that very night.
Have you seen the writing on the wall?
Nada será como antes... It will never be like it was before.
Sometimes I feel like the king. Exposed by the hand of another. Measured by so many and found wanting. People wanting to tear the kingdom around me down.
But when I think of Jesus saying these same words... I feel joy.
"Adam" He says. "I have numbered all the days of your life, your joy and your struggles, even the number of the hairs on your head. I know when you rise, and when you sleep, when you go in and come home. I know you in the valleys and the mountain tops. There is no where you can go to excape from my spirit. I have numbered you among those that love and follow me."
"And Adam" He says "I have measured you and found you faithful. I have seen the depth and the breath of who you are, and I love you still. Remeber that I have measured and layed out you course, I and no other. And that those who measured you and found you wanting were using a measure which is not mine."
"And yes Adam" He says "I am going to divide you from your kingdom. All that you've built, all that you've made, all that you've put your hand to by the sweat of your brow, I am going to divide you from it. In fact I've already started. Have you noticed how nothing quite seems to satisfy you? Some things come close, but eventually those seem to loose their luster. My child, if there is a desire that nothing in this world can satisfy, perhaps it is because you were not meant for this world. Child let go of your kingdom, release you grip on every thing that you hold dear and sacred and come be a servant in my kingdom. Come be a child of the king. And all of this will change, you will change. And all those people you knew before and all those things you did before will be there when you get back, only... it will be you that has changed"
"Nothing will be like it was before."
"The old is gone and the new is comming"
-Adam
December 7, 2005
Silence
The truth is in the prologue. Death to the romantic fool,
to the expert in solitary confinement,
I’m the same as the teacher from Colombia,
the rotarian from Philadelphia, the merchant
from Paysandu who save his silver
to come here. We all arrive by different streets,
by unequal languages, at Silence. - P.N.
November 8, 2005
Is this the land?
...feeling lost today...
...unsure of what comes next, of who comes next...
...scared that God might be more real than I have thought Him to be and that I might have to make a change in my own life accordingly...
...what to do...
...random thoughts at 2 in the morning of selling everything, and trusting God to do what He has said He would do: to feed, to clothe and to be with me as I walk with Him...
...His promice of the abundant life!
Where is this abbundant life? It comes when Im not even looking for it! In comes in the simplicty of spending time with people you dont know well as you sit and paint and get little glimses of the person that Jesus has made them to be. It comes in sitting at In and Out at Midnight and talking about hopes and dreams for the future. Its in random late night phone calls. Its in holding Boston. Its in having paint under your finger nails and a tired body that says to you "Yes I lived today." Its in talking in the cold for three hours and in prayer that you actually mean. Its in the tears and the heart ache. Its in vuneralbility. Its in fixing relationships and friendships; doing the hard things that you dont want to do. Its in doing everything that you are already doing; but with a change in attitude, a change in the soul that says "Here, I am here and called here." Its a connecting those that seem so disconnected. Its in seeing the broken fixed, the blindman who now sees and the cripple who runs and leaps and shouts for joy.
"Every place that the sole of your foot shall tread upon, that have I given unto you"-Josh 1:3
But am I willing to step where I am supposed to go? To tread into the abundant life? To go and take the land that was promiced me?
"So many miles behind
Still I drive with the pedal down
I was off the map hours back
It's beneath the seat, I think
It's with two pennies and a match
And something else, I can't remember
But in the time that it would take to fish it out
I'll be another mile gone
And I feel so wrong
Trying to feel right
In light of all the things I've passed
You'd think that I'd have learned
(Chorus)
This is not the land was promised me
Even as far as my eyes can see
I'm so wound up, Lord, I can't even breathe
And I don't want words, I just want some peace"
-Not the land Caedmon's Call
Is this the land?
Did I live today?
...unsure of what comes next, of who comes next...
...scared that God might be more real than I have thought Him to be and that I might have to make a change in my own life accordingly...
...what to do...
...random thoughts at 2 in the morning of selling everything, and trusting God to do what He has said He would do: to feed, to clothe and to be with me as I walk with Him...
...His promice of the abundant life!
Where is this abbundant life? It comes when Im not even looking for it! In comes in the simplicty of spending time with people you dont know well as you sit and paint and get little glimses of the person that Jesus has made them to be. It comes in sitting at In and Out at Midnight and talking about hopes and dreams for the future. Its in random late night phone calls. Its in holding Boston. Its in having paint under your finger nails and a tired body that says to you "Yes I lived today." Its in talking in the cold for three hours and in prayer that you actually mean. Its in the tears and the heart ache. Its in vuneralbility. Its in fixing relationships and friendships; doing the hard things that you dont want to do. Its in doing everything that you are already doing; but with a change in attitude, a change in the soul that says "Here, I am here and called here." Its a connecting those that seem so disconnected. Its in seeing the broken fixed, the blindman who now sees and the cripple who runs and leaps and shouts for joy.
"Every place that the sole of your foot shall tread upon, that have I given unto you"-Josh 1:3
But am I willing to step where I am supposed to go? To tread into the abundant life? To go and take the land that was promiced me?
"So many miles behind
Still I drive with the pedal down
I was off the map hours back
It's beneath the seat, I think
It's with two pennies and a match
And something else, I can't remember
But in the time that it would take to fish it out
I'll be another mile gone
And I feel so wrong
Trying to feel right
In light of all the things I've passed
You'd think that I'd have learned
(Chorus)
This is not the land was promised me
Even as far as my eyes can see
I'm so wound up, Lord, I can't even breathe
And I don't want words, I just want some peace"
-Not the land Caedmon's Call
Is this the land?
Did I live today?
November 2, 2005
Get out of the car
There was a video we wanted to make once that I was thinking about today. The idea was this. Guy; stuck in traffic; faint rock music in the background (maybe even "Highway to Hell")
Guy comes up, taps on the window.
"Hey you wanna get out of this traffic jam?"
"Sure..."
"Its easy, all youve got to do is get out of the car."
"What?!? Are you nuts, just leave my car here? Now? What will happen to it, I mean will I get it back?"
"Yes leave it, leave it now. Dont worry, we're going to take a much smaller and narrower path, one that leads from the city, from the illusion of day, from the bright lights and the glitzs, out into the desert."
"The desert?!?! Its hot and theres nothing there..."
"I'm there. Its not that im not here too, but the noise can cause people not to listen. Even now with the roar of motors and horns its hard to hear me. And the desert is still and quiet and there we can talk. Because all of this (he waves his had at the traffic) is leading to destruction. Its wide and easy and lots of people go this way."
"But what about my car? I still have payments..."
"It will not fit. The way we will go will be so narrow and tight that nothing but who you are will fit. Nothing youve built, nothing you have and nothing youve done will fit through where we must pass."
"Nothing?!? But ive done so much and seen so much, ive been apart of so much..."
"Yes but they dont tell you who you are. They arnt who you are."
"So who am I?"
"That's what we are going to find out."
"Who are you?"
"That's also some thing you're going to find out"
"So you want me to get out?"
"Yes"
"Right now?"
"Yes"
"Umm" He reaches accross to grab his breifcase out of the passanger seat.
"You wont need that"
"Umm" He reaches to turn the keys off to his car.
"You wont need those either"
"Umm" he starts to grab a map out of the side door.
"Nor that. Come my child. Come with me. I will show you the way."
And he openned his door stepped out onto the asphalt and set out on a new journey, that might cost him more than he was willing to give, but in which he would find his life again.
-Adam Thomas
Guy comes up, taps on the window.
"Hey you wanna get out of this traffic jam?"
"Sure..."
"Its easy, all youve got to do is get out of the car."
"What?!? Are you nuts, just leave my car here? Now? What will happen to it, I mean will I get it back?"
"Yes leave it, leave it now. Dont worry, we're going to take a much smaller and narrower path, one that leads from the city, from the illusion of day, from the bright lights and the glitzs, out into the desert."
"The desert?!?! Its hot and theres nothing there..."
"I'm there. Its not that im not here too, but the noise can cause people not to listen. Even now with the roar of motors and horns its hard to hear me. And the desert is still and quiet and there we can talk. Because all of this (he waves his had at the traffic) is leading to destruction. Its wide and easy and lots of people go this way."
"But what about my car? I still have payments..."
"It will not fit. The way we will go will be so narrow and tight that nothing but who you are will fit. Nothing youve built, nothing you have and nothing youve done will fit through where we must pass."
"Nothing?!? But ive done so much and seen so much, ive been apart of so much..."
"Yes but they dont tell you who you are. They arnt who you are."
"So who am I?"
"That's what we are going to find out."
"Who are you?"
"That's also some thing you're going to find out"
"So you want me to get out?"
"Yes"
"Right now?"
"Yes"
"Umm" He reaches accross to grab his breifcase out of the passanger seat.
"You wont need that"
"Umm" He reaches to turn the keys off to his car.
"You wont need those either"
"Umm" he starts to grab a map out of the side door.
"Nor that. Come my child. Come with me. I will show you the way."
And he openned his door stepped out onto the asphalt and set out on a new journey, that might cost him more than he was willing to give, but in which he would find his life again.
-Adam Thomas
October 31, 2005
You dont have to live like this!
You don't have to live like this.
2 Cor 5:17
Eph 4:22
1 Pete 1:3
You
Dont
Have
To
Live
Like
This.
You don't have to live like this
You don't have to live like this. A message to the world.
Im serious... are you listening?
Am I even listening to my self?
Roll it around on your tongue.
I don't have to live like this.
Yell it.
I DON"T HAVE TO LIVE LIKE THIS!?!!
Wisper it with quiet reflection.
I don't have to live like this...
And then pray.
And change.
This was my prayer...
God, I want to be fully prepared for amazing things to happen.
Are you. Am I? Now my prayer, when I pray for growth or for other people or aginst sin and evil, i pray with this phrase...
I am fully prepared for amazing things to happen.
And its painted on the floor, on the wall, on my guitar case. Its written in my bible and on my mind and on my heart.
I am fully prepared for amazing things to happen.
I AM FULLY PREPARED FOR AMAZING THINGS TO HAPPEN!
I am fully prepared for amazing things to happen.
October 25, 2005
Believe
14 And when they came to the disciples, they saw a great crowd around them, and scribes arguing with them. 15 And immediately all the crowd, when they saw him, were greatly amazed and ran up to him and greeted him. 16 And he asked them, “What are you arguing about with them?” 17 And someone from the crowd answered him, “Teacher, I brought my son to you, for he has a spirit that makes him mute. 18 And whenever it seizes him, it throws him down, and he foams and grinds his teeth and becomes rigid. So I asked your disciples to cast it out, and they were not able.” 19 And he answered them, “O faithless generation, how long am I to be with you? How long am I to bear with you? Bring him to me.” 20 And they brought the boy to him. And when the spirit saw him, immediately it convulsed the boy, and he fell on the ground and rolled about, foaming at the mouth. 21 And Jesus asked his father, “How long has this been happening to him?” And he said, “From childhood. 22 And it has often cast him into fire and into water, to destroy him. But if you can do anything, have compassion on us and help us.” 23 And Jesus said to him, “If you can! All things are possible for one who believes.” 24 Immediately the father of the child cried out and said, “I believe; help my unbelief!” 25 And when Jesus saw that a crowd came running together, he rebuked the unclean spirit, saying to it, “You mute and deaf spirit, I command you, come out of him and never enter him again.” 26 And after crying out and convulsing him terribly, it came out, and the boy was like a corpse, so that most of them said, “He is dead.” 27 But Jesus took him by the hand and lifted him up, and he arose. 28 And when he had entered the house, his disciples asked him privately, “Why could we not cast it out?” 29 And he said to them, “This kind cannot be driven out by anything but prayer and fasting.”
Where is my belief? Why do I feel so inadequate? Like Ive been tested and found wanting? Lord help my unbeleif.
JESUS
HELP
MY
UNBELEIF!
Where is my belief? Why do I feel so inadequate? Like Ive been tested and found wanting? Lord help my unbeleif.
JESUS
HELP
MY
UNBELEIF!
October 24, 2005
3 Weeks
Our passions are not too strong, they are too weak. We are far too easily pleased.-Jack Lewis
In those days I, Daniel, was mourning for three weeks. 3 I ate no delicacies, no meat or wine entered my mouth, nor did I anoint myself at all, for the full three weeks. 4 On the twenty-fourth day of the first month, as I was standing on the bank of the great river (that is, the Tigris) 5 I lifted up my eyes and looked, and behold, a man clothed in linen, with a belt of fine gold from Uphaz around his waist. 6 His body was like beryl, his face like the appearance of lightning, his eyes like flaming torches, his arms and legs like the gleam of burnished bronze, and the sound of his words like the sound of a multitude. 7 And I, Daniel, alone saw the vision, for the men who were with me did not see the vision, but a great trembling fell upon them, and they fled to hide themselves. 8 So I was left alone and saw this great vision, and no strength was left in me. My radiant appearance was fearfully changed, [2] and I retained no strength. 9 Then I heard the sound of his words, and as I heard the sound of his words, I fell on my face in deep sleep with my face to the ground.
10 And behold, a hand touched me and set me trembling on my hands and knees. 11 And he said to me, “O Daniel, man greatly loved, understand the words that I speak to you, and stand upright, for now I have been sent to you.” And when he had spoken this word to me, I stood up trembling. 12 Then he said to me, “Fear not, Daniel, for from the first day that you set your heart to understand and humbled yourself before your God, your words have been heard, and I have come because of your words. 13 The prince of the kingdom of Persia withstood me twenty-one days, but Michael, one of the chief princes, came to help me, for I was left there with the kings of Persia, 14 and came to make you understand what is to happen to your people in the latter days. For the vision is for days yet to come.”
Prayer and fasting for 21 days, while God had already sent the answer.
I loose focus after a few minutes in my prayer and sometimes as the answer gets to me, Ive already forgoten and moved on thinking God hasnt answered and God hasnt moved, and then I miss it when the answer does come.
What seem our worst prayers may really be, in God's eyes, our best. Those, I mean, which are least supported by devotional feeling. For these may come from a deeper level than feeling. God sometimes seems to speak to us most intimately when He catches us, as it were, off our guard.-Jack Lewis
The riddles of God are more satisfying than the solutions of man.- GK Chesterton
In those days I, Daniel, was mourning for three weeks. 3 I ate no delicacies, no meat or wine entered my mouth, nor did I anoint myself at all, for the full three weeks. 4 On the twenty-fourth day of the first month, as I was standing on the bank of the great river (that is, the Tigris) 5 I lifted up my eyes and looked, and behold, a man clothed in linen, with a belt of fine gold from Uphaz around his waist. 6 His body was like beryl, his face like the appearance of lightning, his eyes like flaming torches, his arms and legs like the gleam of burnished bronze, and the sound of his words like the sound of a multitude. 7 And I, Daniel, alone saw the vision, for the men who were with me did not see the vision, but a great trembling fell upon them, and they fled to hide themselves. 8 So I was left alone and saw this great vision, and no strength was left in me. My radiant appearance was fearfully changed, [2] and I retained no strength. 9 Then I heard the sound of his words, and as I heard the sound of his words, I fell on my face in deep sleep with my face to the ground.
10 And behold, a hand touched me and set me trembling on my hands and knees. 11 And he said to me, “O Daniel, man greatly loved, understand the words that I speak to you, and stand upright, for now I have been sent to you.” And when he had spoken this word to me, I stood up trembling. 12 Then he said to me, “Fear not, Daniel, for from the first day that you set your heart to understand and humbled yourself before your God, your words have been heard, and I have come because of your words. 13 The prince of the kingdom of Persia withstood me twenty-one days, but Michael, one of the chief princes, came to help me, for I was left there with the kings of Persia, 14 and came to make you understand what is to happen to your people in the latter days. For the vision is for days yet to come.”
Prayer and fasting for 21 days, while God had already sent the answer.
I loose focus after a few minutes in my prayer and sometimes as the answer gets to me, Ive already forgoten and moved on thinking God hasnt answered and God hasnt moved, and then I miss it when the answer does come.
What seem our worst prayers may really be, in God's eyes, our best. Those, I mean, which are least supported by devotional feeling. For these may come from a deeper level than feeling. God sometimes seems to speak to us most intimately when He catches us, as it were, off our guard.-Jack Lewis
The riddles of God are more satisfying than the solutions of man.- GK Chesterton
October 18, 2005
To the Rabbi
To the Rabbi of the world
I send greetings. The thing that I've been thinking an dwelling on for the last few weeks is this
Ministry seems inheritently unhealthy.
We who are the ministers are telling people to have a healthy relationship with God, with themselves and with other people. But those who minister are often times even worse off than those that we are supposed to be ministering to. Its almost like we are outside of the body of christ. If the rest of the church is the body of christ, then we are like a personal fitness trainer. Near and around, completly familier with this body, but not a part of it.
People dont meet my expectations of them for relationships. They let me down. They are grumpy and human. I went to church and had a shitty day sunday, to the point where people made me cry. I have thick skin ya'll! Do you know how hard it is to make me cry even under pain circumstances? And these people were just being grumpy. What is a matter with me? I had expectations of frindship and fellowship with people who were looking at me a tool or a sourse of help and information.
The truth is that it is hard for ministers to not look down at those they are ministering to.
Call it what you will, professional distance, keeping ministry and friends apart, whatever. It is sin. I understand the desire to have those who are unrealated to your ministry as friends (and dont get me wrong thats okay to have) but it can be an exscapist retreat from reality. "I just need to get away" and statements like that are signs of unhealth.
Let us be ministers who are healthy.
Let me repeat. LET US BE MINISTERS WHO ARE HEALTHY. Above and before all other things let us be people who are not looking to have healthy ministries. Let us be healthy ministers. Scratch that... Let us be healthy followers of the Christ. May we be covered in the dust of our rabboni.
Remember what life was like before ministry, when being a christian was enough. When identy wasnt tied to your job, to your position, to your ministry, when it was enough to be Sarah and stand unabashedly in the presence of your Father.
Elijah called out to God in the desert of his lonleyness and God shows him a community. Maybe too He has a community for you Sarah. Just a thought.
Remeber that we are all His children. Walk in the fact that you are not a minister or a servant, but a child of God who has been asked to invite others to join you as a child of God. We are the under-Rabbi sent to call forth our brothers and sisters from the world.
Be blessed
The Rabbi Adam Thomas
Rabbi= Teacher
Adam= sinner
Thomas= doubter
The= created and loved by God, unique and chosen.
I send greetings. The thing that I've been thinking an dwelling on for the last few weeks is this
Ministry seems inheritently unhealthy.
We who are the ministers are telling people to have a healthy relationship with God, with themselves and with other people. But those who minister are often times even worse off than those that we are supposed to be ministering to. Its almost like we are outside of the body of christ. If the rest of the church is the body of christ, then we are like a personal fitness trainer. Near and around, completly familier with this body, but not a part of it.
People dont meet my expectations of them for relationships. They let me down. They are grumpy and human. I went to church and had a shitty day sunday, to the point where people made me cry. I have thick skin ya'll! Do you know how hard it is to make me cry even under pain circumstances? And these people were just being grumpy. What is a matter with me? I had expectations of frindship and fellowship with people who were looking at me a tool or a sourse of help and information.
The truth is that it is hard for ministers to not look down at those they are ministering to.
Call it what you will, professional distance, keeping ministry and friends apart, whatever. It is sin. I understand the desire to have those who are unrealated to your ministry as friends (and dont get me wrong thats okay to have) but it can be an exscapist retreat from reality. "I just need to get away" and statements like that are signs of unhealth.
Let us be ministers who are healthy.
Let me repeat. LET US BE MINISTERS WHO ARE HEALTHY. Above and before all other things let us be people who are not looking to have healthy ministries. Let us be healthy ministers. Scratch that... Let us be healthy followers of the Christ. May we be covered in the dust of our rabboni.
Remember what life was like before ministry, when being a christian was enough. When identy wasnt tied to your job, to your position, to your ministry, when it was enough to be Sarah and stand unabashedly in the presence of your Father.
Elijah called out to God in the desert of his lonleyness and God shows him a community. Maybe too He has a community for you Sarah. Just a thought.
Remeber that we are all His children. Walk in the fact that you are not a minister or a servant, but a child of God who has been asked to invite others to join you as a child of God. We are the under-Rabbi sent to call forth our brothers and sisters from the world.
Be blessed
The Rabbi Adam Thomas
Rabbi= Teacher
Adam= sinner
Thomas= doubter
The= created and loved by God, unique and chosen.
October 7, 2005
Prayer
Certain thoughts are prayers. There are moments when, whatever be the attitude of the body, the soul is on its knees.-Victor Hugo
What seem our worst prayers may really be, in God's eyes, our best. Those, I mean, which are least supported by devotional feeling. For these may come from a deeper level than feeling. God sometimes seems to speak to us most intimately when He catches us, as it were, off our guard.-Jack Lewis
The riddles of God are more satisfying than the solutions of man.- GK Chesterton
Our passions are not too strong, they are too weak. We are far too easily pleased.-Jack Lewis
I know God will not give me anything I can't handle. I just wish that He didn't trust me so much.-Mother Teresa
If I find in myself a desire which no experience in this world can satisfy, the most probable explanation is that I was made for another world.-Jack Lewis
They say that God is everywhere, and yet we always think of Him as somewhat of a recluse.-Emily Dickinson
Be sure that the ins and outs of your individuality are no mystery to Him; and one day they will no longer be a mystery to you.-JL
God is not proud...He will have us even though we have shown that we prefer everything else to Him.-JL
If these holy places, things, and days cease to remind us, if they obliterate our awareness that all ground is holy and every bush (could we but perceive it) a Burning Bush, then the hallows begin to do harm. Hence both the necessity, and the perennial danger, of 'religion.'-JL
In the Trinity Term of I gave in, and admitted that God was God, and knelt and prayed: perhaps, that night, the most dejected and reluctant convert in all England. I did not then see what is now the most shining and obvious thing; the Divine humility which will accept a convert even on such terms. The Prodigal Son at least walked home on his own feet. But who can duly adore that Love which will open the high gates to a prodigal who is brought in kicking, struggling, resentful, and darting his eyes in every direction for a chance of escape?-Jack Lewis
What seem our worst prayers may really be, in God's eyes, our best. Those, I mean, which are least supported by devotional feeling. For these may come from a deeper level than feeling. God sometimes seems to speak to us most intimately when He catches us, as it were, off our guard.-Jack Lewis
The riddles of God are more satisfying than the solutions of man.- GK Chesterton
Our passions are not too strong, they are too weak. We are far too easily pleased.-Jack Lewis
I know God will not give me anything I can't handle. I just wish that He didn't trust me so much.-Mother Teresa
If I find in myself a desire which no experience in this world can satisfy, the most probable explanation is that I was made for another world.-Jack Lewis
They say that God is everywhere, and yet we always think of Him as somewhat of a recluse.-Emily Dickinson
Be sure that the ins and outs of your individuality are no mystery to Him; and one day they will no longer be a mystery to you.-JL
God is not proud...He will have us even though we have shown that we prefer everything else to Him.-JL
If these holy places, things, and days cease to remind us, if they obliterate our awareness that all ground is holy and every bush (could we but perceive it) a Burning Bush, then the hallows begin to do harm. Hence both the necessity, and the perennial danger, of 'religion.'-JL
In the Trinity Term of I gave in, and admitted that God was God, and knelt and prayed: perhaps, that night, the most dejected and reluctant convert in all England. I did not then see what is now the most shining and obvious thing; the Divine humility which will accept a convert even on such terms. The Prodigal Son at least walked home on his own feet. But who can duly adore that Love which will open the high gates to a prodigal who is brought in kicking, struggling, resentful, and darting his eyes in every direction for a chance of escape?-Jack Lewis
September 28, 2005
Wanna Jump?
So we started a sort of home group last night where its just a couple of older people (remeber that I'm involved with student ministries so anyone over 24 seems older to me) and we are reading through this book called "Velvet Elvis". There's no prep and no pressure, just us getting to gether to read aloud and discuss.
In movement one (yes he calls them movements not chapters) its a whole discusion about theology. Not about a particular verse or series of beliefes but rather about the usefulness of theology as well as its limitations.
Traditional study of God has been called "systematic theology." Its a building of one idea on to another. The problem with that is that if one idea is called into question (for example, was Jesus born of a virgin? or is the Trinity a valid way for explaining God?) it shakes every thing that we've built apon it. So we take up arms an begin to defend our walls that we constructed against those who would like to pull certain bricks out and threaten to knock down our wall.
That is when we start to defend our theology. There are whole movements that stand as monoliths on a few such bricks. If we take one brick out and examine or question or doubt it, the whole structure might not survive.
Think of the structure of Calvinism or Aminists. Believe these five or so things and every thing will be alright?
In his book, Rob describes a Christianity that resembles a trapoline.
Thats right - a trampline.
Theology is like the springs on a trampoline. They are flexable and bend and can be taken out and examine. They are useful and have a purpose but they are not the whole point. God is the point and theology, teachings about God, serve to help us have a more right veiw of Him. Its not that we cant know God, its just that we cant know everything about God. CS Lewis says that the important thing is not trying to figure out the Trinity(which we can never do) but rather to be caught up into life with the Trinity.
And Im tired of defending the wall.
I just wanna jump. And I wont have to tell someone how much better my wall is, how its bigger and built with better bricks. I want there to be joy in the involvement that I have with Him. And I want that to be what people see, the joy in my life from jumping around like a crazy man so that when I ask the question, they cant help but be caught up in my excitement and answer yes. What question?
So, do you wanna jump too?
Catch ya'll on the flip side.
Adam Thomas
In movement one (yes he calls them movements not chapters) its a whole discusion about theology. Not about a particular verse or series of beliefes but rather about the usefulness of theology as well as its limitations.
Traditional study of God has been called "systematic theology." Its a building of one idea on to another. The problem with that is that if one idea is called into question (for example, was Jesus born of a virgin? or is the Trinity a valid way for explaining God?) it shakes every thing that we've built apon it. So we take up arms an begin to defend our walls that we constructed against those who would like to pull certain bricks out and threaten to knock down our wall.
That is when we start to defend our theology. There are whole movements that stand as monoliths on a few such bricks. If we take one brick out and examine or question or doubt it, the whole structure might not survive.
Think of the structure of Calvinism or Aminists. Believe these five or so things and every thing will be alright?
In his book, Rob describes a Christianity that resembles a trapoline.
Thats right - a trampline.
Theology is like the springs on a trampoline. They are flexable and bend and can be taken out and examine. They are useful and have a purpose but they are not the whole point. God is the point and theology, teachings about God, serve to help us have a more right veiw of Him. Its not that we cant know God, its just that we cant know everything about God. CS Lewis says that the important thing is not trying to figure out the Trinity(which we can never do) but rather to be caught up into life with the Trinity.
And Im tired of defending the wall.
I just wanna jump. And I wont have to tell someone how much better my wall is, how its bigger and built with better bricks. I want there to be joy in the involvement that I have with Him. And I want that to be what people see, the joy in my life from jumping around like a crazy man so that when I ask the question, they cant help but be caught up in my excitement and answer yes. What question?
So, do you wanna jump too?
Catch ya'll on the flip side.
Adam Thomas
September 23, 2005
My Class (and the word for today is...)
Hey.
Had my first real offical class with Father Josiah yesterday. Although its a class on Islam we pretty much talk about whatever comes up. For the class I read the entierty of the Qu'ran and its interesting what Muhammid's veiws about Christianity were. He felt that his book was a completion or addendum to the Old and New Testiments of the Christian Bible. He did however have a really hard time with the Christian idea of the trinity. It is pretty interesting to note that M's contact with the Christian faith was limited to heritics (the Nestorians) who had been kicked out of the Roman church of that time(~600ad).
This lead to a discusion on the nature of christ and the trinty (Nestorus and his followers believed that Chirst had two personalities, one divine and one human and that these two natures acted indipendently of each other creating this idea that Jesus was a Schizophrenic. It is a misunderstanding of the fact that Jesus was God and Jesus was Human. (I know it can be hard to wrap your brain around, if you want an explination of the question of Jesus' human and divine natures then send me a message and I'll post some stuff. There were seven giant meetings of the church where they prayed, seached scriptues, and hammered out the answer to the question Jesus asked of Peter "who do you say that I am?") But the question of these giant church meetings called the "Ecumenical Counsels" brought us to the split of the Roman Catholic Church and the Greek Orthodox Church and the discusion of a single Greek word...
Fileoque... of the Son
Now the concept of the Trinity is pretty interesting, but like CS Lewis says, most people shut down at any mention of numbers and personalities. (For a great book to read I recomend Mere Christianity by CS Lewis. The last section of the book called Beyond Personality deals quite heavily with the trinity.) For a couple thousand years the Jews belived that there was one God. It was the first thing that was leaned as a child. It was recited in the Sha'ma out of the book of Deuteronomy. "Hear oh Isreal, the Lord, our God, the Lord is one..." (Deut 6:4) How does the Idea of the trinity fit into that? Father, Son, Holy Spirit, but yet all one God?
I'm not the best writer in the world and Im kinda shooting from the hip but there are two parts to God, just as there is to every one of us. There is the inside and the outside. The inside part of God consists of all that God IS. If you had to fill in the blank what would you say. "God is _____." Holy? Love? Righteous? Big? Active? these are all adjectives that describe who God is. These atributes apply to God the Father, God the Son, and God the Holy Spirit. Theologians (guys who sit around and think hard about God) call this the ontological Trinity, those things which apply to God as a whole. Take one of the attributes and it applies equally to the Father or the Son or the Spirit.
On the other hand you have all the things that God does. Take for example the story of the baptism of Jesus. The Son comes out of the water, the Holy Spirit decends like a dove, and the Father's voice is heard from above. All of the actions are seperated, the Spirit does one thing, the Father another, and the Son still something else. Everyone has their role to play. And its not just at the baptism of Jesus its all thoughout the scriptures any time that God DOES something it can usually be atributed specifically to either the Son or the Spirit or the Father but not all of them together. This plays out even in our own daily lives. When we pray we are praying TO God the Father, THROUGH God the Son, by the URGING of the Spirit inside of us. This is called the Ecconomic Trinity.
Now don't hear me wrong there is but one Trinity, one God, one Father, one Son, one Spirit. These two concepts are just a way of catagorizing diffrent truths about God. Every truth about God fits pretty nicly into one of these two areas, either the Ontilogical aspect or the Economic aspect of God.
Now with all this being said, lets take a look at a line from the Nicene Creed which is a short statement of what the majority of Christian hold to be true.
"We believe in the Holy Spirit, the Lord,
and the giver of life,
who proceeds from the Father and the Son,"
That is what it looks like today. But until the 900's it looked like this.
"We believe in the Holy Spirit, the Lord,
and the giver of life,
who proceeds from the Father,"
Notice the difrence its missing this phrase "and the son." This creed was put together by the brightest minds of the time in one of the church counsel meetings, but was changed by one of the Roman popes. The other 4 major churches at the time didnt like this at all and when the other churches went to meet with the pope all they got was a sit down and shut up from his people. The eastern church became what we call the Eastern Orthodoz church and the Roman chuch became the Holy Roman Catholic church and this split became know as the great schism.
(All this background for me to tell you a story...Yikes)
So Father Josiah, being an Eastern Orthodox Preist, follows the origional way of the Creed. When sitting in his office yesterday I had a sort of light bulb tuned on in my head. If it is true, where does the Fileoque doctrine fit in? That's the question for today. More to come...
Adam
Had my first real offical class with Father Josiah yesterday. Although its a class on Islam we pretty much talk about whatever comes up. For the class I read the entierty of the Qu'ran and its interesting what Muhammid's veiws about Christianity were. He felt that his book was a completion or addendum to the Old and New Testiments of the Christian Bible. He did however have a really hard time with the Christian idea of the trinity. It is pretty interesting to note that M's contact with the Christian faith was limited to heritics (the Nestorians) who had been kicked out of the Roman church of that time(~600ad).
This lead to a discusion on the nature of christ and the trinty (Nestorus and his followers believed that Chirst had two personalities, one divine and one human and that these two natures acted indipendently of each other creating this idea that Jesus was a Schizophrenic. It is a misunderstanding of the fact that Jesus was God and Jesus was Human. (I know it can be hard to wrap your brain around, if you want an explination of the question of Jesus' human and divine natures then send me a message and I'll post some stuff. There were seven giant meetings of the church where they prayed, seached scriptues, and hammered out the answer to the question Jesus asked of Peter "who do you say that I am?") But the question of these giant church meetings called the "Ecumenical Counsels" brought us to the split of the Roman Catholic Church and the Greek Orthodox Church and the discusion of a single Greek word...
Fileoque... of the Son
Now the concept of the Trinity is pretty interesting, but like CS Lewis says, most people shut down at any mention of numbers and personalities. (For a great book to read I recomend Mere Christianity by CS Lewis. The last section of the book called Beyond Personality deals quite heavily with the trinity.) For a couple thousand years the Jews belived that there was one God. It was the first thing that was leaned as a child. It was recited in the Sha'ma out of the book of Deuteronomy. "Hear oh Isreal, the Lord, our God, the Lord is one..." (Deut 6:4) How does the Idea of the trinity fit into that? Father, Son, Holy Spirit, but yet all one God?
I'm not the best writer in the world and Im kinda shooting from the hip but there are two parts to God, just as there is to every one of us. There is the inside and the outside. The inside part of God consists of all that God IS. If you had to fill in the blank what would you say. "God is _____." Holy? Love? Righteous? Big? Active? these are all adjectives that describe who God is. These atributes apply to God the Father, God the Son, and God the Holy Spirit. Theologians (guys who sit around and think hard about God) call this the ontological Trinity, those things which apply to God as a whole. Take one of the attributes and it applies equally to the Father or the Son or the Spirit.
On the other hand you have all the things that God does. Take for example the story of the baptism of Jesus. The Son comes out of the water, the Holy Spirit decends like a dove, and the Father's voice is heard from above. All of the actions are seperated, the Spirit does one thing, the Father another, and the Son still something else. Everyone has their role to play. And its not just at the baptism of Jesus its all thoughout the scriptures any time that God DOES something it can usually be atributed specifically to either the Son or the Spirit or the Father but not all of them together. This plays out even in our own daily lives. When we pray we are praying TO God the Father, THROUGH God the Son, by the URGING of the Spirit inside of us. This is called the Ecconomic Trinity.
Now don't hear me wrong there is but one Trinity, one God, one Father, one Son, one Spirit. These two concepts are just a way of catagorizing diffrent truths about God. Every truth about God fits pretty nicly into one of these two areas, either the Ontilogical aspect or the Economic aspect of God.
Now with all this being said, lets take a look at a line from the Nicene Creed which is a short statement of what the majority of Christian hold to be true.
"We believe in the Holy Spirit, the Lord,
and the giver of life,
who proceeds from the Father and the Son,"
That is what it looks like today. But until the 900's it looked like this.
"We believe in the Holy Spirit, the Lord,
and the giver of life,
who proceeds from the Father,"
Notice the difrence its missing this phrase "and the son." This creed was put together by the brightest minds of the time in one of the church counsel meetings, but was changed by one of the Roman popes. The other 4 major churches at the time didnt like this at all and when the other churches went to meet with the pope all they got was a sit down and shut up from his people. The eastern church became what we call the Eastern Orthodoz church and the Roman chuch became the Holy Roman Catholic church and this split became know as the great schism.
(All this background for me to tell you a story...Yikes)
So Father Josiah, being an Eastern Orthodox Preist, follows the origional way of the Creed. When sitting in his office yesterday I had a sort of light bulb tuned on in my head. If it is true, where does the Fileoque doctrine fit in? That's the question for today. More to come...
Adam
September 9, 2005
My new friend
Ive got a new friend. His name is Father Josiah. He's a Priest in the Greek Orthodox Church. Okay maybe he's not a friend yet, but rather an eager aquantance on my part.
It started with a requirement to graduate. I had to take an upper division, non-U.S., interdiscipinary course. I was given the History of Latin america. I mean, I dont even speak Latin (if you didnt laugh that's okay, neither did my Counseler, nor the Registar, nor the lady at the book store...) Ive got nothing aginst Latin America, I just am not all that interested. So I was in the bookstore getting my books and right next to my books I see books for a History of Islam class. HELLO.
So I went back to my counseler and got my class changed after a breif discusion on whether or not a History of Islam class would be a non-US history class. Seems obvious to me but I guess its not.
I get to class. And there's no body there. I was ready to leave until this guy walks in. Big beard, long hair, black robe with a silver cross. My teacher. Father Josiah.We sat and talked about the diffrence between Easter and Western churches, what worship is and C.S. Lewis while we waited for the others who enrolled to show up. No one ever did. We spent the rest of the night talking about our ministries and what the class was going to look like. We scrapped the two books that were originally picked for the class and went with some more dificult and indepth books (like reading the entire 177 chapters of the Qu'ran for the next class). Im going to his church rather than to CBU for our meetings.
When walking out he said that I probably wouldnt want to leave his office. I asked if it was because it was full of books. He said yes. Then I said that it probably smelled like old books too. He said no it smells like pipe. So you smoke? I asked. Sheepishly he said Only in private as if was a little unsure of how I would react being at a baptist school. Can I bring mine? I asked. This class is going to be better than I thought he said. My sentaments exactly.
-Adam Thomas
It started with a requirement to graduate. I had to take an upper division, non-U.S., interdiscipinary course. I was given the History of Latin america. I mean, I dont even speak Latin (if you didnt laugh that's okay, neither did my Counseler, nor the Registar, nor the lady at the book store...) Ive got nothing aginst Latin America, I just am not all that interested. So I was in the bookstore getting my books and right next to my books I see books for a History of Islam class. HELLO.
So I went back to my counseler and got my class changed after a breif discusion on whether or not a History of Islam class would be a non-US history class. Seems obvious to me but I guess its not.
I get to class. And there's no body there. I was ready to leave until this guy walks in. Big beard, long hair, black robe with a silver cross. My teacher. Father Josiah.We sat and talked about the diffrence between Easter and Western churches, what worship is and C.S. Lewis while we waited for the others who enrolled to show up. No one ever did. We spent the rest of the night talking about our ministries and what the class was going to look like. We scrapped the two books that were originally picked for the class and went with some more dificult and indepth books (like reading the entire 177 chapters of the Qu'ran for the next class). Im going to his church rather than to CBU for our meetings.
When walking out he said that I probably wouldnt want to leave his office. I asked if it was because it was full of books. He said yes. Then I said that it probably smelled like old books too. He said no it smells like pipe. So you smoke? I asked. Sheepishly he said Only in private as if was a little unsure of how I would react being at a baptist school. Can I bring mine? I asked. This class is going to be better than I thought he said. My sentaments exactly.
-Adam Thomas
Here
A friend asked me what "Here" was about.
I guess it means that after running for so long it starts to feel almost normal. So when the heavens open up and you get just this little glimps into reality it allows for monumental growth.
Ive spent all my life searching, moving from one thing to the next. It why ive had so many jobs in a wide diversity of fields and Ive changed my major 4 times and am always looking to move away to Sacramento, Chicago, Alabama, Kenya, or China. Its why most of my friends dont last longer than a year or two. The grass is always greener, you know?
And I was at church on Sunday night. "The Well Student Community" it was an intense kind of night with worship and scripture readings and communion and prayer interspersed through out the night. After we were done with worship and every body was praying, I took the bread and the cup, thanked God, and took communion. After the service we had planned to have an allnighter because of the Labor Day weekend. The all nighter had started and I was outside sitting on a plastic chair waiting with some of the kidos that were not staying, kind of staring into the building when Chelsea came over to me to ask if I was okay, because of the long day. And with tears in my eyes i said,"yeah, im tired. But there is nowhere quite else that I'd rather be." And it was true. Its only in the past few years that I even recongnized this as a problem, people were always congradulating me as move from one thing to the next and never helped me identify this deeper underlying problem in my life. And then Willy came along and was the first to point it out, and call it out for what it was, sin. But its not something that I myself can force. I cant force myself to be satisfied and complete and when I tried, I ownly found myself more empty to the point where
empty
felt
normal.
And through some work of God on my life I am exactly where He wants me to be right now. For some reason He has me here and there is no where else I'd rather be.
Its not some emotion I tried to conjuer up inside myself
Its not some intelectual understanding of the sovernty of God
Its not some opinon that people have talked me into.
Its just how it is.
-Adam Thomas
September 6, 2005
July 22, 2005
In memory of "John-John" Hodges
I couldnt sleep last night. I paced around and watched late night TV shows at my friends house untill I just passed out on the couch from sheer exhaustion.
I lost a kid yesterday.
He was 18 years old and had just graduated high school and on his way to start school at the local Junior College. He and his friends got side swiped by a drunk driver doing ninty on a surface street. John was thrown from the car and died on impact.
If there is one thing that my personality is geared towards is fixing things, whether its cars, or electrical, or peoples lives or broken relationships, I want to fix them. But I cant fix this. All I could do was hug his mom as she burried her head and cried into my shoulder. All I could do was cry too.
It would be easy to blame God. No parent should have to burry their kid. But this world is broken, fallen and diseased and as followers of Christ it is our job to take up His mandated from Colosians 1, reconciling the world and others to the Father, throught the Son, by the work of the Holy Spirit.
I lost a kid yesterday.
He was 18 years old and had just graduated high school and on his way to start school at the local Junior College. He and his friends got side swiped by a drunk driver doing ninty on a surface street. John was thrown from the car and died on impact.
If there is one thing that my personality is geared towards is fixing things, whether its cars, or electrical, or peoples lives or broken relationships, I want to fix them. But I cant fix this. All I could do was hug his mom as she burried her head and cried into my shoulder. All I could do was cry too.
It would be easy to blame God. No parent should have to burry their kid. But this world is broken, fallen and diseased and as followers of Christ it is our job to take up His mandated from Colosians 1, reconciling the world and others to the Father, throught the Son, by the work of the Holy Spirit.
July 18, 2005
Life of the ordinary
Sometimes I wonder how I've gotten to this point in my life. I look at the decisions I've made (and even the ones I didn't make that really were decisions) and wonder how I got to this point of drudgery, an endless monotony, that drones like a swam of bees floating somewhere just out of sight, loud and tonal enough to invade every thought that passes through my head. But i am looking to change all of that. It seems that there have been these amazing revilitory experiences, that I can now look back on, add together as a whole, and make decisions based on these facts. These are not all of my experiences, mearly the ones I've chosen to remeber as waymarkers for me on my journey (even these wont be in chronological order.)
I recently took a class called Applied Christian Ethics at Cal Baptist where the class sought a answer to the question "What is my responce?" A girl gets raped and wants to have an abortion...what is my responce? Eight hundred thousand Tutsi get massecured in Rwanda...what is my responce? Children left orphand by the massive tsunami that happend this past december are being kidnaped; forced into slavery and prostitution in southeast Asia...what is my responce?
Chelsea just got back from Thailand. She went over there on a walkabout touring the countryside on foot. There was a hundred percent humidity with tempretures approching one hundred and ten degrees and the huts that they stayed in were equiped with little more than a fire on which to cook food. But the thing that she shared with me was after the tour was over and she had a few days to spend in Bangkok. She went down to the red light district and into a club where there were girls there, with numbers. They werent in somesort of beauty contest; they were there to be sold to the highest bidder. And to see these girls and the predators that were there to feed on them, made Chelsea so sick, that she started to cry. Some of the girls who worked in barcame over to her at this point, telling her not to cry, that she was beautiful, and that every thing would be okay. They didn't get it. How could they have? They knew no other life but this, brutilized by the world around them, and not even realizing it.
Its then that I realized that I've never taken a risk in my entire life.
But life with Jesus is one of risk and pain and suffering along with immence joys. Another friend of mine Elyse works with young kids in 5-Day clubs. One of her kids that just acceped the Lord, died from a congienial condition. Immence sorrow, but also immence joy. His death will be a catalyst for our lives, to live and love as harder as we know the days infront of us become fewer and fewer as time passes.
I once heard a quote from a guy who said "that all it takes for evil to triumph in the world is for one good man to do nothing." In light of all of this I have mad a decision to apply with the International Justice Mission to go and work in either Thailand or Kenya. The opening in Thailand is more up my alley, working in after care with victims, but I already have a rudimentary grasp on Swahili which is the common trade language in Kenya.
Please pray for me as I am making decisions and preparations over the next couple of months. Pray that I would have strenght an courage and that, like Jesus, I would have the heart to "seek and save that which is lost."
In His service,
Adam
I recently took a class called Applied Christian Ethics at Cal Baptist where the class sought a answer to the question "What is my responce?" A girl gets raped and wants to have an abortion...what is my responce? Eight hundred thousand Tutsi get massecured in Rwanda...what is my responce? Children left orphand by the massive tsunami that happend this past december are being kidnaped; forced into slavery and prostitution in southeast Asia...what is my responce?
Chelsea just got back from Thailand. She went over there on a walkabout touring the countryside on foot. There was a hundred percent humidity with tempretures approching one hundred and ten degrees and the huts that they stayed in were equiped with little more than a fire on which to cook food. But the thing that she shared with me was after the tour was over and she had a few days to spend in Bangkok. She went down to the red light district and into a club where there were girls there, with numbers. They werent in somesort of beauty contest; they were there to be sold to the highest bidder. And to see these girls and the predators that were there to feed on them, made Chelsea so sick, that she started to cry. Some of the girls who worked in barcame over to her at this point, telling her not to cry, that she was beautiful, and that every thing would be okay. They didn't get it. How could they have? They knew no other life but this, brutilized by the world around them, and not even realizing it.
Its then that I realized that I've never taken a risk in my entire life.
But life with Jesus is one of risk and pain and suffering along with immence joys. Another friend of mine Elyse works with young kids in 5-Day clubs. One of her kids that just acceped the Lord, died from a congienial condition. Immence sorrow, but also immence joy. His death will be a catalyst for our lives, to live and love as harder as we know the days infront of us become fewer and fewer as time passes.
I once heard a quote from a guy who said "that all it takes for evil to triumph in the world is for one good man to do nothing." In light of all of this I have mad a decision to apply with the International Justice Mission to go and work in either Thailand or Kenya. The opening in Thailand is more up my alley, working in after care with victims, but I already have a rudimentary grasp on Swahili which is the common trade language in Kenya.
Please pray for me as I am making decisions and preparations over the next couple of months. Pray that I would have strenght an courage and that, like Jesus, I would have the heart to "seek and save that which is lost."
In His service,
Adam
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)